Perfectionism: The Most Respected Form of Self-Sabotage
Perfectionism: The Most Respected Form of Self-Sabotage It may surprise you to learn that perfectionism can be a subconscious barrier to happiness. Rather than motivating growth, perfectionism often functions as an Upper Limits Problem, quietly keeping you from experiencing satisfaction, joy, or rest. Perfectionism operates like a prison of rules and regulations. It is governed […]
When Success Feels Like Betrayal: Family, Identity, and the Fear of Outgrowing Your Roots
When Success Feels Like Betrayal: Family, Identity, and the Fear of Outgrowing Your Roots You may carry a deep-seated belief that you don’t deserve to be happy or successful. When good things come your way, success can create an internal conflict with a self-image shaped around feeling fundamentally flawed. For many people, the family bond […]
Upper Limits, the Internal Thermostat and Self-Sabotage
Upper Limits, the Internal Thermostat, and Self-Sabotage Resetting your internal thermostat takes ongoing effort. Inside your brain is an emotional regulator that works much like a happiness thermostat. When you start “heating up” with too much joy, success, or love, this system can kick in to “cool you down” through negative thoughts or self-sabotaging behaviors. […]
Why Am I Afraid to Be Happy?
Why Am I Afraid to Be Happy? This may sound strange, but being happy can feel hard. When you haven’t had much experience with happiness, it doesn’t feel normal. Even when things get better, contentment can feel uncomfortable. Being happy can feel vulnerable—even scary. In the past, when you let your guard down, something bad […]